Dead boy's elegy

Dead boy's elegy...
One Morning when the last drop of dew fell into the humble ground of my dreams
I found myself before a great vast scene, meadows of velvet softness
views of landscapes lost into labyrinths of sinful delight
views of unspeakable beauty and dark at the same face
I found myself before the great image of a dark fall water
The wind was blowing singing candide sorrows of joy
telling me secrets hidden into the corners of my memories.

One Morning when the last beam of the sun hath touched the valleys of my dreams
I found myself before a mirror water of forgotten essence
I saw thereto deep into wrapped whirls of insanity a sad reflection
a dead boy sunken into tears of solitude and pain
a dead boy driven into madness by the lost hope of his own
a Dead boy frozen into everlasting oblivion frozen into demise
a haunted spawn come from lost horizons, a boy I saw into the dark fall waters.

Once I saw that boy alive, once when the trees were young
when the eerie calm used to befall into vast dunes of snow
when the spring of primeval days came along with blosoming dew
when even the sun hath not seen the face of the moon
in those primal days when everything was young and pure
I saw that boy alive, happily singing cacophonies of sweet ambrosia
Once, just once I saw that boy, and I gave my back on him.

Vanishing memories of haunted times came to my mind
like ghosts tourmenting my poor and withered soul
Oceans of images crossed before my eyes and one action came
the crying of lost mourning, silent sweeping and ordeal
I found myself wandering through some ghastly moments of wrath
and my sore throat's screaming out of angry minded heart
his effigy was providing such pain in my soul, his image lost brought memories to my mind.

Bells from unknown chapels began to ring and resound
like drums from under domains, like a heart undead beating
blinded melodies of forgotten echoes of time rumble in me
like if the mere image of this dead boy could awaken a lost life
long forgotten ghost gone through the stargate of eons
Dismal situation of bright view, dismal image was that boy
the dead boy under the frozen water of my dark fall water.

Some say that only what he needed was a toy
only what he needed was a gentle touch, a simple word of joy
Some say, the boy just needed a verse of simple poetry, a mere look with tender and care
to comfort his hollow heart, Only what he needed was a toy, only what he needed was a word
a gentle act of affection and comfort, but his wish faded
faded losing into shades like dust in the infinite time
he did not need a manifesto of love, just he needed a gentle touch.

The twilight hath befallen into the valley of my dreams
the warm embrace of the night was falling again to cover my ground
the time faded again like water through my fingers
and I was there still standing lost into the vision of this effigy
the dead boy lying in silence and tranquility in the bottom of the well
Then the night came and with her, her sister moon to comfort my cry
but my mind was still fixed into this boy's eyes, trying to bring those memories.

Fading and falling I stood for ages before that limbonic image
slow winds were breaking soundscapes, and the waves of velvet came to me
This boy moved all that was in my world, and showed me new colours
in my onw world where the storm and dark reign, I was falling now
Falling eternally into spheres of katatonic damps
I was floating freely trying to flee from the shadows' tentacles
and just the eyes of this dead boy kept me attached to this loneliness

I listened to the sound of his silence leading me into shades of purple
sliding down, falling, falling into deep dark horizons of me
MY heart was aching and drifting through agony and anxiety
only because one morning when the last drop of dew fell
I found myself before the reflection of the mirror waters
Sliding down I was falling deep and deep into me
Falling into the temptation of this dead boy's eyes

I was trying to expand the view from my shallow memories
Lonely Was I, Lonely Was I glancing deep into this image
Only what he needed was a toy, a gentle touch
to lead him into the warm embrace of a smile
To lead him through the dark, to lead him into home
suddenly the crows cried aloud into the night
and the skies open to weep and let their tears fall

I was there still, standing at the edge of memory
and the sky was weeping mourning because of my pain
and then, from the opened eyes of the boy I saw the truth
He was the boy I once saw just to dismiss and betray
He was the boy I used to be, the boy that only needed a toy
only needed a gentle boy to lead him through the dark
and the tears flew from my withered eyes, for I was him.

One Morning when the last drop of dew fell into the humble ground of my dreams
I found myself before a great vast scene, meadows of velvet softness
views of landscapes lost into labyrinths of sinful delight
views of unspeakable beauty and dark at the same face
I found myself before the great image of a dark fall water
The image of a long forgotten ghost, the reflection of a boy
the reflection of me, it was there, the ghost of the boy...

(only what he needed was a toy, a gentle touch to lead him through the dark
only what I needed was a gentle word, a tender embrace to awake this dead boy from slumber)

Membranous Devilish Wings

Into quaint and pearing shadows of abysmal secrecy

I found myself falling, and falling infititely

beguiling the shadows to embrace me and lead me into demise

I was flunged into fluttering thoughts of fear and pain

ungainly I fall and Fall with no more hope than the redepmtion of Grim

And It was dreadful, because it happened in the soul, without deatail I can describe.

It was the ecstasy of a nightmare, and the fifthessence of devilish.

the happening of the pandaemonium, for I went deep and deep

into agonic torture of existance, I am Falling, and Falling

Deep and deep into the tombs of ancient fears now awaken

I am falling into a infinite space of inmaculate darkness

pulled down by voracipous and ghaslty demons from black cold ether

and Then I Saw the horror, I was flying freely into this

abysmal nightmare

with a gift given in masses of dirges of dim

a gift given by gaunt and ghastly yore

A gift given methought as a wretch caprice by grim

which I calsped with all pain as an ordeal of limbonic sense

A gift imposed as aI shrieked in agony

the Membranous devilis Wings of oblivion

for I am flying now but still fallin into the realm of my own

oblivion, I am now the demon that tempts crows and spawns

from the abyss of my own devotion

I am now flying but still falling deep into the darkness of my pain

with the membranouse devilish wings given once by grim

For the most wild yet most tender gift is being a terrified demon

I am, and I was, and I will be the destructor

devil tempter of my own soul

I am the demon that grabs myself with the paws of ill shape

to carry my fears along, just for the gift of these Wings...

, and then I saw the horror, and the ill sense of my being...

Wrath

My heart is drifting into shades of anger and wrath, Today I have grown such anger in my withered soul, and I am discharging into emptiness, for no one can hear me, or want to, lonely I am, really alone into a vast meadow of people, but hollow they are, for unto their ears only silence can pass through, Bloody my existence, My heart is pull out into the demise once more, and again and over again, like an infinite circle of vicious agony, no one can hear me or want to, because My heart is drifting, drifting, and I shrink until my existence will be gone, and nothing appears to get close to reach a gasp and rescue me, even against my will, if one will dear to listen just rejection will I receive, for cursed I am into the explotion of wrath and solitude, Today I have grown into such anger and wrath, Today I want to be really apart, be one with the wind and flow eternally in the silent night, dancing under the silver rays of the moon, caressing the surface of peaceful waterfalls...

I am sinking into my own tears, that have grown to become a great dam of uncertainty and blidness, but even the nature in its infinite wisdom rejects me and pulls me away, for such fiend like me cannot crawl on the surface of this earth, for Cursed I am, Cursed by my hand, I am blue, and grey, sunken into everlasting waters of memories and rejection, I hide beneath the shipwrecks of bitterness, and I don't dare to see my reflection, for My heart is drifting into anger, through landscapes of emptiness, I am vanishing, becoming one with the nothingness, and no one can hear me or want to, for my weepping have turned into mute selfish regrets...

I am so bitter, and angry, I am full of wrath and rejection, I want to blame everyone of everything, but I am the only one to blame, for I am cursed by my own hand, I am a failure of my own will, I am leading myself into insanity, for I want, I just want to be apart from this sanity, or so called reallity, I condamned my being for I Am, I AM, and I WILL BE, and I want to be no more...

My heart Today is drifting even more than yesterday, and less than tomorrow, for I am bitter and angry, my wrath has possessed my senses, and now I am blind, I don't want to see others' happiness, because that is the constant souvenir of a lost time, I cursed am, I cursed am, and I cursed Will be .I want this no more, I want no more my heart to drift, I want my heart to stop feeling and beating, because, I am bitter and angry and no one can or want to hear my call...

Oblivion...

Many names I have been addressed, but just one I obey, Chaos, My name, what is my name? Well it doesn't really matter at all, for I am just a shade of a dying afternoon sun, I was, I am, and I will be, despite my deep desire of stopping being, I am, and I will keep on being, for there is no scape for beings like me, once I was told, "Creatures like thee still crawling on earth? Thou shalt be death" and mayhaps that is truth, I shall exist no more, for no desires lay into my heart, for there is no more flame to fuel my inner machinery, I am into the limbonic labyrinth of desperation and solitude, my names? Again? want'st thou to know my names? It is easy, just take a look into thy inner reflection, there thou shalt find the answer to this question, for Many Names I have been addressed, but Just one I obey, CHAOS, I am beyond chaos and I Am chaos myself, I don't understand me, and my universe, mayhaps I am in the threshold of insanity, crossing it in and out at the same time, mayhaps my names have driven me into the paths of crazy desires, mayhaps...

I am not sure, for Many Names I have been addressed, But One I just obey, and now, I don't remember it, for, I am lost, in front of the water mirror of desperation, I am wandering into meadows of bleak dimness, covered by shades of green, blinded by lights of weak luminicense, walking down rainbows of grey and .... No more, this is just wasted time, I shall no write, for there is no solution, only complains, only complains, I have been defeated by my hand, and I don't want to go beyond my dark, I am many names and one, and one and many names, I have wandered this lands before human kind, I Am, but I don't want to be, I don't want this I AM any longer...

Many Names I have been Addressed, but now I don't remember them for I rather abandoned all of them into the shielded past of my uncertainty, I want to release myself and flee into the night into the qlipphotic tunnel, beyond Sitra Ahra, beyond everything, and finally meet the hollowness and oblivion, for mayhaps that will be my name at the end Oblivion, Oblivion and Oblivion, I WAS, I AM, I WILL BE, Oblivion, dust into dust, the death's demise, the end of the Beginning, and the Beginning of the End, I am Just me, many names I am, but none I obey now, for I am now OBLIVION...

Another Day In Hell...

At the end of another day in hell, I wonder and wander, lost into interrogative stanzas of dismal sense, listening to echoes from beyond, like euphonies made by fallen Angels, melodies of sweet cacophony, pure symphonies, At the End of another day in hell, my thoughts flee from me, and abandon my existence, for not even myself stand sharing the room with me, the darkness and forlorn dreams make a dance of sublime grace into the lake of my sorrow, like black crows taking fly into the inmensity of night... And Again I Am here, alone, wandering into the shadows path, wondering and wondering, but no answer come to me, for I evoid them, only the music from beyond is the real shelter, the protection from my own hand, for demise can come unto me by my hand, At the end of another eternity in hell, I just lay on the ground naked before the eyes of fiendshly companions, Alone, surrounded by decay and demise, Alone at the edge of a cliff of fear, waiting for the wind to either take me away or push me into the oblivion, but I shall say I rather oblivion than being taken away, there is no redemption, there is no salvation, for my doom is in me, for I am my own Doom, because I am the creator and prosecutor of my own, and At the end of another day in hell, I am just here standing alone, coiling into foetous mud of tears, coiling into my wrath, I am just here standing alone, for I am alone for now and ever...

Reflejo

Y, vi tal terrible horror, abominación sin nombre

Y, mire profundamente en tal pútrida y oscura imagen

Efigie de peculiar repugnancia, con oscuros ojos de sangre viva,

oscura piel como la noche, semblanza oscura con caracteres mas allá de lo humano.

Y de repente lo vi, vi tal enfermiza y pútrido espectro de abismos mas

allá de toda pesadilla, para mi horror, O pobre de mi!

Este horror venia cada vez que pensaba en aquella imagen,

solo la muerte podría liberarme, por que la mera mirada

dentro de tales ojos espectrales podría congelar cualquier

deseo fervoroso.

ni tan solo la palidez enfermiza de la luna podría opacar tal imagen de mi mente

y, vi tal horrible y sin nombre horror ante mi,

mi propio reflejo, la imagen de mi efigie espectral.

It is the declaration of a long Forgotten Ghost...

Mayhaps, just mayhaps, one or two people will read this, or won't, I really don't care, I have no readers at all, for long ago I was forgotten and forbidden, the passing of eons carved unto my soul deep marks of wasting winds, despite and betrayal hath entered my kingdom, for I allowed them to, for pain and grief have grown deeply into my withered soul, otherwise, I just would have grown strong and proud, however I just allow many people to enter my soul, my temple, and in disguises of kindness, in disguises of friendly and humility, but, Lo! how they hurt me for I allowed them, this is the declaration of a long fogotten ghost, the simple mourning of pain woe after woe, I rise among the decadent pain of solitude, growing in fears and misantrophy, This is the declaration of a Long Forgotten Ghost, this is just the crying in silence, for I know no-one will hear or listen to it, this is just the melancholic episode of everyday, Today I mourn, alone, as always, as usual, by my hand, and by the hand of my own, for others were just allowed to enter and defeat my stronghold, This is me, saying sad words of mourning essence to the silent wind, the silver tears of the moon fall in an attempt to drown my sorrow, in a kind attempt to release me from this pain, Pain by the way I have chosen to suffer, This is the declaration of A long Forgotten Ghost, the declaration of grief dependence, of solitude dependence, I have tried to touch the summit of apparent beauty, but it is just a mirage, I have tried to reach the love of unworthy ones, but it is just a mirage in black mirror waters, for to a long forgotten ghost, the oblivion is just the abide, I want to cry no more in silence, mayhaps to cry along with a solitary companion, who doesn't care to share solitude with me, but it is to demand too much from the destiny, MY DESTINY, this is the declaration of a long forgotten Ghost, a Long Forbidden being, a Long long long Banned Ghost, I learnt to sleep alone every night of my life, yet I shared mine, but, again, it was just the foetous disguise of demise, the cold arms of Oblivion once agan took me to the place where I belong, to the silence of nothingness. THIS IS THE DECLARATION OF A LONG FORGOTTEN GHOST, a Long forgotten soul, withered and dying, only alive and living thanks to the cacophony of sweet dismal symphonies in silence, This is the silent mourning of nothing, for no-one will listen, no -one will care, for, although I complain, This is just a silent and forgotten declaration of a shadow, a ghost lost in memories of unworthy ones...